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Meet Idit Sharoni, LMFT

Today we’d like to introduce you to Idit Sharoni, LMFT.

So, before we jump into specific questions about the business, why don’t you give us some details about you and your story.
It’s funny to look back and realize not many people actually encouraged me to become a marriage therapist. I say funny because when I declared in grad school that I wanted to specialize in couples, the common response was, “…bless your heart,” or “good luck with that!”. So, for a couple of years I decided to shelve the idea and specialize in parenting issues, but then I noticed that the parents who came to see me needed couples work more than parenting skills. I saw that those who weren’t having a good relationship were in no condition to apply parenting skills that require teamwork.

At that point, I did some self-talking that sounded like, “Everyone says couples’ therapy is hard, but I know for sure that I can help couples, save marriages, and save homes from falling apart. I don’t care what anyone says. I’m doing it!” And I did. I started looking for the best trainings in the US for couples’ therapists and found quite a few. I am trained with The Gottman Institute (research based approach), Esther Perel, Michele Weiner-Davis, Terry Real and more.

As I got deeper into the work of couples, I learned that within relationship work, there is a difference between working with couples who fight and argue a lot and those that have been through a shattering traumatic event such as infidelity, so I specialized in working with couples in the aftermath of infidelity.

At that point in my career, it wasn’t just about helping the couples I got to see in my office. I wanted to get the information out there to as many people as possible and with that came the idea of podcasting. I played with it for a while and wasn’t sure how I’d be able to do it and manage my private practice. I thought… “What if I had a co-host?”. From that point, it became clear to me that I had to figure this out and start podcasting ASAP. I chose my good friend who happens to be an excellent therapist who handles the other side of my work. She does breakup and divorce work. Together, we started the Relationships Uncomplicated Podcast that keeps on surprising us with how fast it grows. We are at thousands of listeners at the moment and growing by the day. People tell us it’s because we make our relationship advice simple and easy to understand and implement.

These days, I’m enjoying managing a thriving couples’ therapy private practice, a booming podcast where I get to spread the word that relationships are doable, and working on an online course for couples.

I’m a busy woman but I love every minute if it and when I look back at all those remarks people made about being a couples’ counselor, I’m filled with joy that I didn’t listen to them.

Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
Is any meaningful road ever smooth? Mine has had a few challenges mainly due to building a business from scratch when all I knew was how to do therapy. In grad school I learned some amazing skills on how to treat people presenting with all kinds of issues, but I had no idea on how to do business. I literally thought all I had to do was rent space and hang a shingle and the rest will follow. Now I know it doesn’t work this way. It took me a full year of business coaching some years ago, and many hours on webinars & courses to get the entrepreneur in me to shine. It’s a learning process for me, but I thrive on challenges that keep me on my toes.

We’d love to hear more about your business.
I love helping couples in committed relationships who desire a step by step plan to strengthen communication and or rebuild trust after infidelity. I help partners find new ways to relate to each-other so that they can stop fighting and start communicating. When partners fight or don’t get along, they move past issues with no resolution. They sweep things under the rug ending up not feeling heard. When we don’t feel heard, we start building “protective walls” and stop self-disclosing with our partners. In turn, we start drifting apart which is a dangerous situation for any couples’ relationship.

When infidelity occurs, couples’ lives are shattered into little pieces. Learning that your partner had an affair can be traumatic and trigger post-trauma responses. I help couples in the aftermath of infidelity with the ambivalence of whether to stay or not, with rebuilding of trust, with healing from the pain, and with making the right changes to create a stronger marriage thereafter.

My experience from working with couples taught me that when the process is more structured, has a roadmap, and offers tools and assessments throughout – results are immensely improved. I noticed that couples who did therapy through my programs got better outcome in less time than those who entered traditional week-to-week therapy not knowing what to expect. Since then, I kept developing and perfecting my programs learning from my experience with couples in the field. At this point, I have the pleasure to provide a product that has been tried and perfected, and brought some great results to couples looking to save their relationships.

Unlike traditional week-to-week venting therapy sessions, I provide a structured therapy plan that offers healing and change into a relationship.

3 major things set me apart:

1. Specialty – I’m a Relationship Expert not a generalist. Some therapists offer no specialization and will see you for almost any issue from depression to sibling rivalry. As an expert, I specialize in seeing couples for their relationship issues solely. This means, that I offer my experience and expertise to couples and am happy to refer out to my excellent network of expert colleagues for other issues.

2. Background & Experience – Couples’ therapy is my passion and it’s what I do best. I’ve spent thousands of hours helping couples heal, grow, and have the connection they desperately want. I get relationships both as a professional and as a person in a long term relationship. That means that beyond my training and professional experience, I know what it takes to make a relationship work throughout the years.

As a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, I have extensive training in couples therapy, but that never stops me from continuing my post graduate education in the field. I make sure to stay updated on the most cutting-edge therapy modals and research related to couples and relationships.

3. My Making It Work Programs – Unlike traditional week-to-week venting therapy sessions, I provide a structured therapy plan that offers tools, assessments, and healing and is thoughtfully tailored to the couple’s needs.

Is there a characteristic or quality that you feel is essential to success?
I believe that it has to do with my devotion to making our world better one relationship at a time. I think that allowing people to open their hearts and share it with someone they love simply brings more happiness to the world. Every time a couple leaves my office after having a breakthrough, my heart fills with joy knowing that these two are happier and more hopeful than they were before they came in, I know that when they get home they will be better parents, better siblings, better sons and daughters, and better friends. And that just fuels my passion to keep doing this and loving every minute.

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